Positive Thinking – Part 2: Accepting Things We Can’t Control

2012 Behaviour Matrix copy

2012 Behaviour Matrix copy (Photo credit: Robin Hutton)

No matter what happens, you were not born to have an unhappy life.  After all, you have superb qualities and good intentions.  You strive to be as independent as possible and avoid being burdensome to those around you.  You don’t intend to hurt or cheat others.  In fact, you like to help others out whenever possible.  However, you must put yourself first and look out for your own survival.  If all these things I mentioned about you are true, you have more self-worth than you realize.

All the good things that happened to us or we have done become eventually become invisible or overshadowed by the bad.  It’s like they’re hiding peacefully in the background, never making a sound.  On the other hand, the bad things we have done or have happened dart out, shout at us, or just stick out like sore thumbs.  Hence, all we see is the bad and rarely, if ever, the good.

Dealing With Things We Cannot Control

Still, we must learn to accept things we have limited or no control over as:

  1. News events as wars, poverty, or crime.
  2. Environmental problems as pollution or global warming.
  3. Taxes.
  4. Unfavorable economic conditions.
  5. Societal changes or behavior.
  6. Bad weather and natural disasters.
  7. Actions or behavior of others.
  8. Health problems or ailments.
  9. Job-related circumstances.
  10.  Laws, rules, or regulations.
  11. Accidents, mishaps, or disasters.
  12. Bodily flaws
  13. Failures or defeats.
  14. Wealth
  15. Financial setbacks
  16. Depreciation of our possessions.
  17. Personal weaknesses or faults.
  18. Bad luck.
  19. Events that don’t go as planned.
  20.  Unwanted emotions

Hopefully, these 20 things I mentioned cover everything.  If I left anything out, please let me know.

We must not let these unfavorable circumstances affect our self-esteem or happiness.  There is no way we can fault ourselves over things we cannot control.  If something bad happens, if it doesn’t affect you directly, accept it as it is.  If it does, find a way around it.  Whatever happens, your fate and ego should remain unaffected.

You’re Only Human

Another thing to remember: you’re only human!  As humans, we’re SUPPOSED to make mistakes.  No matter how hard we try to be perfect, we never will.  In God’s eyes, we are humans, or just another species of animals and all animals have natural flaws.

Sure, our modern-day society conditions us not to make mistakes or they will cost us big time.  Unfortunately, the damage done by our mistakes cannot always be reversed so we must learn to live with it.  This is especially true if we say or do things that hurt others.  All we can do is try to button things back up the best we can as we bring the plaintiff back to status quo, and pretend the mishap never occurred.  In most cases, things are never 100% as good as before the unfortunate event.

Likewise, we all have weaknesses and faults.  Some of them can be corrected by simple changes in habits, but others require drastic measures that we may be uncomfortable in undergoing.  It’s not always easy to admit we’re wrong or to face our fears so we don’t always attempt to do so.

Finally, fatigue, anxiety, or boredom gets the best of us at times.  We also let our responsibilities in life overcome us.   Some nights we cannot sleep and some days we become tired at work or during our daily chores.  When one or all of these things happen, we naturally tend to neglect things, compromise our job performance, or commit selfish acts.  We’re only human.

At the same time, we turn to indulge in harmful substances as cigarettes or caffeine-based beverages to get rid of these unwanted feelings.  Some of us fool around when we should be working while others take extended breaks.  I’m not knocking people for doing these things, because I’ve done them myself (except for smoking).  Although such behavior is not good for our health or well-being and is generally coined as improper, we just can’t help that.  We’re only human.

Boredom is natural and a hindrance in our lives.  When we become bored or consumed in some personal matter, we find it hard to focus and pay attention.  This makes it hard to listen and perform as we should.  In some instances, we go out and shop or engage in some other form of entertainment just to cure our boredom, but that doesn’t always work.  Such behavior can take a toll on our finances.  I’m not condemning this behavior.  After all, we’re only human.

As the saying goes:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Keep this prayer in mind whenever something goes wrong.

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